i wish i was in arizona

2006 woooooo!!!!

2006-01-06T04:53:38Z

sooo...its a new year. time for a new beginning..

i was trying to recap wat was so good about 2005 and there were more bads then goods:

bads:

-2005 started off with brian and brett moving to az 1-5-05. a year ago today. and i miss them terribly

-mad other friends moved away
ie: jill-iowa
dannielle-florida
leah- arizona

lost a lot of good ones

-mad mris on my knee
-lots of fights with my parents
-the whole jail thing
-the death of the volvo
-longboard stolen
-stupid fights

but then there was the good stuff

-met mark <3 9.3.o5 baby
-stronger relationships
-i can officialy name my 5 best friends on one hand : brian,brett,stephh,carly,jill and mark but thats a given
-realized who my true guardian angels are K + K
-learned alot about myself
-new car
-had some really good blazes with carly and the summer will be ours
-having my best friends come home for my bday + 420 which rocked my socks.
-established my third sister and she means the world to me
-tons and tons of good stuff

for 2007:
i want to get over my fear of heights. i want to go to arizona. i want to go in an airplane for the first time. i want to help people who need it. i want a teacup yorkie. i would love to go to cali. i want to make a difference as gay as it sounds. i want to establish deeper friendships with my friends. i want to blaze alot. i want to get out of bergen. i want to stop dying my hair out of the box. i want to find a new job that pays more. i want to get in a wicked fist fight and come out of it being the champion : ). maybe stop smoking ciggs?

-cut my hair for the new year. bangs are banging.
-saw thursday with my best friends! amazing show. couldnt ask for anything more.
- i just need to work out a few things with mark and then he should be good. he got a 3 month job in the city and a dollar raise. things are looking up for him so its good. still on a break but its necessary.
-myspace drama is gay and its never gonna be solved.

summer 06 will be the biggest blaze summer ever. watch out. me and my friends are gonna own it. im talking wake and bakes. hookah parties. when parents go away is gonna be fully taken advantage of. dont doubt me.

i love my life right now...minus the fact that i woke up this morning with a bloody nose..bloody tonsils..but i should be feeling better by tommorow hopefully. and its not strep thank god!woot. ok peace out.one.haha

p.s happy bday deirdre!

<3 stella

All i want for christmas is you

2005-12-25T20:55:29Z

yeah so its christmas...where to begin.

last night was amazing. christmas eve tradition accomplished. so good. everything just went so right. for once this week i was happy for more then just 20 minutes..possibly like 3 hours. it just ruled. dunkin donuts with the ghetto kids got to be a little too much. but hey.

yeah so my mom bought me tiffanys again for the second christmas in a row..she knows that i hate that shit yet she decides to buy it to what...change me? so ridic.

i got a northface jacket...the wrong one. some shirts..and yeah the desperate housewives season. that was my best gift. but yeah. 2 new hoodies.not bad

this week has been a little crazy for me..no regrets though.right now its for the best and i hope i see results.

so lets just consider this a time out but the feelings are def. still there

thetideiscoming @ 2005-12-14T09:50:00

2005-12-14T14:53:10Z

blah.blaze.cant wait for break.

thetideiscoming @ 2005-12-06T10:31:00

2005-12-06T15:36:40Z

yeah i think im getting sick...

i have been doing a lot of school work lately. i did a 15 page spanish paper thing yesterday. everything in spanish. pretty sick.

i hardly sleep anymore. and i dont really hang out with anyone.

im so excited about work..im working mad hours over the next 3 weeks. closing till 12 should be rather boring..

yeah im gonna go blaze and then go to school. thats all i really do by myself now so peace

thetideiscoming @ 2005-11-30T10:09:00

2005-11-30T15:12:35Z

is it bad that i like really hate a majority of my friends lately...guess so.

i just have a lot of stuff to get done with for school...uggghh stressing.

im really happy that my boyfriend is finally out : )
its really nice to have a realy boyfriend instead of a saturday visit. hehe
and we are in love..: )

it seems like all i hear is bad news lately. i want something really really really good to happen to my family. like a miracle that will change them. but it wont happen. : (

so there are like these girls on myspace that keep dropping my boyfriend obnoxious comments.. cottage cheese ass. oh dannielle you know wat im saying.

its not that i hate my friends...its just that they arent being friendly and im trying very very hard but its just weird...always busy or just i dunno. i give up lol..im tired and im going to bed.

thetideiscoming @ 2005-11-09T21:52:00

2005-11-10T02:58:20Z

my new cartlidge piercing is so infected it hurts so freaking bad... : (

i miss the love of my life..i just want him home </3 everyone pray for me and mark! please. nothing new over here just going to school...work...coming home/chilling with my girls/ and then going to bed and praying..thats it. im a dork i know. i cant wait for this weekend..drunk times : ) <3 stella

thetideiscoming @ 2005-10-31T16:45:00

2005-10-31T21:49:16Z

id been living a lie for 35 days that i wish i would still be leaving...

you know i shouldnt have listened to everyone and told my parents but i did. trust is gone..but more importantly so is he. they have taken away the one person that i truely love and will continue to love no matter what..the conditions are..no visits and no relationship until he gets out and proves to them that he has changed...i think everything is unfair and noone should stand in the name of love.

now try telling me that your life is fucked up and how much your life sucks. i hate everyone seriously.

thetideiscoming @ 2005-10-19T11:30:00

2005-10-19T15:33:15Z

i got to see him yesterday <3 sooo much drama. noone understands honestly...this is the hardest thing that i have ever gone through in my life..its not fair.

yeah but i saw him and he blew me kisses and told me that he loved me..and i love him..yup i love him..so much. got in trouble for taking a picture with my camera phone..i got schooled actually. and i felt like an idiot. whatever.

i met his mom..i dont even know if she likes me..but then again like..all that matters is that he loves me and he does and hes sorry for what he did. and i honestly know that he is sorry..noone else knows. he fucked up big time...but everyone deserves one big mistake in life..i wonder what mine will be?

26 more days after the other one. and a lottta money to be owed...but we got this..

at this point i just need everyone to stop telling me to dump him. i wouldnt do that and the thought has never crossed my mind honestly. i love him.

thetideiscoming @ 2005-10-16T18:37:00

2005-10-16T22:37:24Z

i got to see him..so sad. i love him so much..

my heart hurts

i love him sooo much

2005-10-15T16:32:30Z

i think that since the sun came out...its gonna be a good day: )

after 2 weeks of waiting i get to see my baby. im so excited and nervous all at once. it rules

i have the cutest shirt to wear tonight thanks to best friend. its grafitti and it says stella <3 mark. its adorable...: )

jill is home and last night we had so much fun. first we got brian and kyle j...then brian realized that he had no shoes on and that he had to "pretend that he was wearing shoes" so he walked into best buy..pearl paint..and mcdonalds on rt 17...with naked feet...nasty..i gave him a few piggy back rides...it was all good. then me and jilly came home and attempted to watch lords of dogtown until adam called...and i wanted to "Shoot him" haha.

So we went out cruising and put glow in the dark stars up in my car. hott..met up with jackie and jason. good times..met up with more people...then met up with rafe and gabe..and i ended up hanging out with rafe and gabe till 2:30. sweet ass..alright thats it. wish me luck : )

<3 love ya

thetideiscoming @ 2005-10-09T11:11:00

2005-10-09T15:11:19Z

i just wanted to see him..and i was shut out again..wat else in new this week?

just..why did you do it..so dumb

thetideiscoming @ 2005-10-04T11:11:00

2005-10-04T15:13:01Z

yeah so yesterday was me and marks 1 month. i love him so much and its nice to know that someone loves you back that much. and trust me i know that he loves me.and i def love him. no ? about it. i might get to see him twice this weekend..woohoo. thats about it.

happy anniversary jilly. i wouldve won but someone doest think.

thetideiscoming @ 2005-10-02T18:36:00

2005-10-02T22:36:02Z

i think its really cute how you click the link in my info and read my journal like everyday.

i love my boyfriend.no matter how much shit is talked..ive got his back. i just want him home soon : (

thetideiscoming @ 2005-09-23T08:00:00

2005-09-23T12:00:54Z

i really really love mark..him going to the city has made me realize how much i love him because im without him.

wow.

thetideiscoming @ 2005-09-18T12:26:00

2005-09-18T16:35:41Z

i love mark. hes the best boyfriend in the world! hes really nice and he loves me and its nice to actually feel the love that someone has for you. we are a cute couple. yesterday was our 2 weeker. woot. i found his weak spot too! what a cutie.

anyhoo..im just chillin here listening to incubus waiting for c larocca to come get me to go to the fair. woot woot. its gonna be so hott. i have to get mark a sword cause he really wants one.

yeah i barely write in this anymore cause school and work has totally taken over my life. no joke. i love all my classes except spanish 2. teacher is a physco bitch...i actually have a feeling that i might pass math this year. score. im a dumbass...and yeah work is work. yesterday was my last day at stop and shop..i really like that shit. it was a nice place and i loved working with amanda. she rules.

speaking of amanda. im going to the see the early november on oct 22 with her erika and kimberly. im way excited cause i would also like to see senses fail since its been awhile..atlantic city baby. gonna be a sweet car ride.

yesterday i worked a 12 & a half hours in a row. first at stop and shop and then at cvs...yes im back at cvs. in norwood. its so much better. its so quiet. at tops we get 12 rolls of a film and thats if its extremely busy. other then that its absolutely dead and theres no paul egan to be on your ass all the time. and i work with jaimie. she rules. yeah so life is grand. i love love love my boyfriend. hes amazing and adorable.

oh yeah me and stephh ripped up the carpet in my room...eww..rolling in dirt for like 7 hours. pretty nasty. but anyway im getting new furniture which will be amazing considering that i have seriously had my dresser for 19 years...yes my spice girl stickers from the lollipops are still on it. crazy memories. that dresser is my homie. my floor in my room is like one big disco floor. so feel free to come over and boogie.no joke.

i cant wait for halloween.joanie: be afraid!

<3 stella

thetideiscoming @ 2005-09-06T12:51:00

2005-09-06T16:54:39Z

yeah i havent updated in awhile..

school started.not bad not bad.

i missed the freaken fireworks yesterday.

mark and i are officially going out. SEPTEMBER 3 bitches. i love him to death.

nothing really else..quit stop and shop.new job.

thats it. oh yeah. someone please buy me the fannypack cd. i want that.

thetideiscoming @ 2005-08-30T14:38:00

2005-08-30T18:41:47Z

im guessing that i should update since everyone clicks the link in my info..id say thats a pretty good hint.

i just wanna say that last night was pure bullshit and im stupid for waiting that long and crying. haha im an idiot

thanks stephh jill + jilly.

im sitting in my pajamas and i have work in 20 minutes.great.i miss working with amanda..i always get stuck with weirdos.i think im getting a second job as well.

wow cool school in 2 days.awesome : (

jill leaves tommorow.lets see i have now had 1, 2 ,3 ,4 ,5 yeah 5 friends move away.my life rules.

bye

thetideiscoming @ 2005-08-23T08:03:00

2005-08-23T12:03:24Z

last night was amazing <3

thetideiscoming @ 2005-08-18T02:56:00

2005-08-18T06:59:06Z

i swear the day after my 23rd bday....route 66 all the way.whos in?

nothing new..living each day one day at a time.

friends suck.ha

im really gonna miss my jill from closter when she leaves.each night we become so much closer.wow i cant picture life without her

thank god blazehead is back..i was getting bored

its so funny how guys change people..im never gonna let that happen to me and unlike them i wont forget about friends or just life in general.

stop and shop rules

the end

thetideiscoming @ 2005-08-14T17:51:00

2005-08-14T21:51:21Z

the first kiss is always the best kiss <3

thetideiscoming @ 2005-08-09T13:23:00

2005-08-09T17:26:32Z

bam the vicious cycle starts all over again..

last night i ran into to someone from highschool..and she said i changed. weird. i dont think i did.but hey..

best blaze last night..ahhh crazy. i was knocked out in my bed at like 2 am. haha. and all i did was sing the las ketchup song and pass out.

and thats about it. i really apprecite carly cause shes the best blazer ever. we dont back down no matter wat shady situations we are thrown into!

thetideiscoming @ 2005-08-08T03:19:00

2005-08-08T07:20:13Z

im in love xcore.

and im talking to lia...cause shes the coolest 3am chatter in the world. hottness.

thetideiscoming @ 2005-08-07T12:48:00

2005-08-07T16:56:55Z

im gonna have to admit..that i thnk that this summer sucked so bad...i dont know if it is because brian and brett arent here or because i havent talked to or is friends with anyone from last summer..or the fact that i worked two jobs..or any of that...but yeah i think it sucked.

and its almost over..

ok...so my love horoscope for today says : Today is going to be all Technicolor rainbows and honey colored sunsets, and sand between your toes under the moonlight for you two. You'll sure be glad you've got each other.

BULLSHIT! ha

everyday i have been reading my horoscope since i was probably hmm a senior in highschool...because i totally believe in them..and most of the time they are right..but this morning when i read that i was just like hmm...NO.

i dont have anyone ha. id love to have someone but i dont know what is going on. some nights its really awesome and then its nights like last night when i get hung up on or not talked to..i dunno. Some more confusion to add to the pot. but i love him.

so last night i went to amandas at like 9:30 cause i was sitting home watching pimp my trailor. funny. me + her + ashley + li hibs just sat around talking. it was interesting cause i never just sit around with just them. it ruled. then dan came over and went out driving and stuff.mad fun. and yeaa then i gave rides home to my drunk family + thats about it.

i worked stop and shop from 9-5 yesterday. i honestly like it. its so different when its just you. not bad. i think my parents leave tonight on vacation for 2 weeks.sweet

ok peace out
<3 stell

thetideiscoming @ 2005-07-30T15:47:00

2005-07-30T19:56:36Z

last night ruled hardcore. im so glad that we didnt pay 11 dollars...

instead we took that 11 dollars and met cheryl.the love of my life. the seville diner is really cool and could quite possibly be our new hangout when we get bored in our jersey life..

cheryl told carly that we were her best table...that meant alot to me.

the downfall of the night was not finding the carnival.bummer...

but i was happy again
-getting tricked out by stephhs car.dammit
-hello kitty toaster

man.i wish i was in that car when it hopped up on the pathway to cvs.would have been so hott.except for the scary decapitation that went down. shit.

overall it was a good night..and me and carly made a friend at wendys.cause we rule.

thetideiscoming @ 2005-07-29T18:39:00

2005-07-29T22:47:23Z

You dont know how sick you make me .You make me fuckin sick to my stomach
Every time I think of you I puke....haha perfect timing.

the bet is on. ill throw 5.

yeah so my last day of cvs was on wednesday? yeah it ruled. felt so good walking out those doors knowing that all the cvs drama was being lifted off of me..thanks to everyone who stopped in. :)

blah blah blah

thats it. i think im just gonna have to start longboarding by myself at night..i dont really feel up to doing things these past couple of nights. an i should anyway...i mean i just paid 70 bucks right?

hmm alright thats it for now. goodnight